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By the time August rolls around, I am ready for a change. The dog days of summer in my humid Southern home state often leave me feeling physically and emotionally drained. I eagerly welcome my favorite season, fall, with open arms and a sigh of relief. After months of action-packed, fun-filled days of endless “leisure,” I am ready to return to what I enjoy most: structure, routine, and cooler temperatures.

Caring for a loved one with a chronic illness can feel much the same. It often creates a constant state of physical, emotional, and mental exhaustion. The responsibilities and stress can weigh on a caregiver like a blazing summer sun. The intensity of your hopes and concerns for someone you love can become overwhelming. Even with support, the relief may never feel complete.

When a loved one depends on you to help navigate everyday activities, a sense of numbness can slowly creep into both of your lives. Caregivers are at risk of developing physical pain and tension, losing interest in daily activities, experiencing poor sleep, and living with ongoing exhaustion.

My sister-in-law lived with multiple sclerosis and was housebound and bedridden for 21 years. Over time, our family learned that my brother’s response to our well-meaning question, “How are you doing?” would always be a polite but firm, “Fine.” He understood long before I did that only another caregiver could truly appreciate a more honest and detailed answer.

I often describe my years as the primary caregiver for our four aging parents as the hardest job I have ever loved. Looking back, I believe my brother and I were both right.

So, what can we as cancer patients do to help the people who advocate for and care for us?

We may be the ones with the diagnosis, but cancer affects our family members, friends, and caregivers as well.

Take time to check in on their emotional and physical well-being. Encourage them to make room for relaxation, not just falling asleep in a recliner. Help them schedule time for hobbies, exercise, or activities they enjoy. Encourage them to stay connected with friends. Listen carefully when they share their stories, frustrations, or daily concerns. Whenever possible, make adjustments that allow your caregiver to get the restful sleep they need, and need often.

In recent years, I have noticed that casual apologies such as “sorry” or “my bad” have become common in everyday conversations. When I hear those phrases, I sometimes wonder how much thought or sincerity is behind them. Instead of apologizing automatically, consider expressing appreciation.

For example:

“Sorry I forgot” becomes: “Thank you for reminding me.”

“Sorry I didn’t understand” becomes: “Thank you for explaining it again.”

“Sorry I overreacted” becomes: “Thank you for staying calm.”

“Sorry I was rude” becomes: “Thank you for your patience.”

“Sorry I disagreed” becomes: “Thank you for hearing me out.”

“Sorry I need help” becomes: “Could you please guide me?”

“Sorry to bother you” becomes: “I appreciate your time.”

“Sorry I kept you waiting” becomes: “Thank you for understanding.”

These small shifts in language can transform an automatic response into a genuine expression of gratitude. They remind the people who care for us that their efforts are seen, valued, and appreciated.

At NCAN, we often say that no one should face neuroendocrine cancer alone. That includes caregivers. Behind every patient is often a network of people offering rides, attending appointments, managing medications, providing encouragement, and simply being present through the ups and downs of life with cancer.

To all the caregivers in our community: we see you, we appreciate you, and we thank you. Your dedication, patience, and love make an immeasurable difference.

This August, as we look ahead to a new season, let’s remember to care for the people who care for us. A little gratitude can go a long way, and sometimes the simplest words are the most meaningful:

“Thank you for being here.”

Remember, we’re always here for you if you need us.